Today was a hard day.
It is tough to be the one in charge of the school "drop-off." I got there before the “morning teacher” was there, so Samuel held my hand while we went to his room and put his diapers away, put his mat cover on and hung his diaper bag. We then walked to the "Penguin" room (where the kids go until 8am) and it was then that Samuel realized/remembered what was happening to him. He started sobbing and crying and wanted me to hold him. Then Pam (his teacher) arrived, so I went with him to the "Turtle" room with her; she took him from there and I just felt awful. He kept crying “mama, mama” as I left…
I got a call from Pam today saying he had a tough morning, but was happy once they went outside... and then he "sort of" ate his lunch, but had a good nap. And by afternoon, seemed to be doing pretty well playing with his classmates. BUT... she said he had a bad case of diarrhea and if it happened again (in a row) we would have to come get him. WHAT? SIGH... How would we do this? What if they call tomorrow saying he can't stay?!
INSERT SIDE COMMENT
[anyone wanna be his backup daycare?!]
The good thing (or so I thought) was that I GOT TO BE THE GOOD GUY AND PICK HIM UP TONIGHT! :-) Yay...
But as soon as we got home all he cared about was: "where is dada? where is dada?" He kept getting on the chair and looking out the window, waiting in anticipation of Joe getting home.
NOW...
I know Joe reads this. I know family member read this. :-)
I LOVE IT that Joe and Samuel have formed an incredibly close bond. I mean that. I think in the long-run it will have an amazing impact on Samuel.
But... it is hard, as "the mom" to feel like you are second-rate (especially after working a hard day at work and already feeling inadequate as a mom...) My heart hurt. I realize the kid is only two and he hasn't a clue he is hurting me. But when he rejects the idea of reading together or playing with Thomas the Train just because he is fixated on "dada" getting home - it's tough stuff.
Okay... done venting. Joe and Samuel are on their nightly walk. I know they will be back shortly. I LOVE it that I have a husband who loves his son and wants to spend time with him. There is nothing better - I know this. I am just a whiner.
It's all good. Right?
reading this just before bed...i was gonna write to you and ask you about some of these things today...as my work has sorta started back.
ReplyDeletei'm sorry it was a hard day. i really am. you know that. i'm glad that samuel's days get better as he goes along. keep working on the bond with him, both of you, and he will keep learning to trust that you are coming back and where you are leaving him is safe. poor sam.poor you.
C
I think you will find that there will be times when Sam is with Joe and he asks for YOU. Just ask Joe to let you know. My kids both ask for dad if they get a booboo when I am there or am upset b/c I said no to something. It is automatic reaction for them to ask for the other parent in that situation! I was hurt at first too b/c I am the one who does spend more time with them. But soon realized the toddler logic in it all!!
ReplyDeleteAnd definately have a back up daycare plan. With fall and winter coming, there will be lots of days you can't send them for colds, diarrhea, etc. And always happens when you both CAN"T take a day off...murphy's law! Take care,
Missy H
Jill-
ReplyDeleteAlex is still way into Daddy too. He always prefers Daddy over me. Occasionally he'll go to me but if Daddy is home it's all about him. This has gotten better lately but at first I was a little hurt (I do have 3 girls who often wanted me) so figured it was his turn. I think it might be a boy/daddy thing or something. It will get better. Alex is starting to adore me and I've heard boys really grow up to adore their mamas. The good news is he's been able to bond with a man..I have heard that can be hard for some kids from orphanages. You are a good mom!!!
Jill
ReplyDeleteKids tend to go back and forth on which parent they prefer. Sometimes our kids want me and sometimes they want their daddy more. It is normal, not only for the kids to do that, but also for it to hurt just a little. Our youngest still sleeps with us a lot, starts out the night wanting to cuddle with me, but at some point in the night, she decides that she wants her dad, no matter how many times i might bring her closer to me.
Just wanted to let you know that this is all normal. You are a great mom, and so blessed.
xoxo
alishia